Fake Breasts...

[Uncle]

Oh dear Lord, that gator's going absolutely shit house rat crazy...

I don't think she has the slightest clue that she just put in a request to be terminated with "extreme prejudice"

Uncle.

[Havoc]

Nobody could be THAT crazy. Except that in my job I've had to deal with folks who were.

The little starstruck wide-eyed dance-- again, I'm caught between giggling at the silliness of the whole thing and cringing at just how crazy Uthy is, how dangerous that might make her.

I was wondering about the breasts too. Doesn't make sense for a gator, nor does the hair. Yet they can almost-- ALMOST slip past without my noticing, in spite of being there sometimes and otherwise not, because radical changes in body form and placental mammal-- specifically, humanoid-- features on reptiles, marsupials, and mythicals who shouldn't have them are so common in the fandom.

But you don't play things that way, do you, MF? Slop is unusual in that it plays the furry multiple sapient species game in a more realistic way, including a lot of the horrors that would naturally arise along with the wonders of such diversity. And you don't do much silly-- except with that sinking feeling that, giggle as much as you want now, the sky is about to fall.

I suspect the only thing keeping Uthy alive at the moment is that if she were to... um... go away... there have been too many people who would know where she was last seen alive. Sam has to be thinking how he can solve this little problem after arranging for Uthy to be seen at some place other than Sam's own backyard pool. I am rather surprised that he seems to be trying to reason with her still. I'd almost rather expect him to look at her wisely and say "That's a wonderful idea! And I know this excellent abandoned hunting camp where we can set up our headquarters for this operation! Nobody will hear the screams... oh, no, don't call your television friends yet, let me show you the place first, just you and me. It's perfect for hiding the evidence. You'll see."

And again-- hypothetical God, what happens if Uthy realizes Sam knows Tony Ray, even knows how to contact him, and hasn't let her know?

[Uncle]

I was wondering about the breasts too. Doesn't make sense for a gator, nor does the hair.

And again-- hypothetical God, what happens if Uthy realizes Sam knows Tony Ray, even knows how to contact him, and hasn't let her know?

First off, Uthay's fucking nuts. always has been. She's played the "What wig?" routine more than once already. She was kind of raised by mammals and is suffering delusions of being one herself.

Oh, and I suspect that she's about to find out the hard way that Sam know's Tony Ray when he tells the pig to "Make her go away. And get it right this time."

"That old Monster" indeed.

Ah yup.

Uncle.

[Buster Charlie]

I think this is a great story so far, and this page has some great payoff.

What I think is delicious is how poisoned we are by furry art that our mind is conditioned to accept non-mammals with mammary glands, tits, jugs, cupcakes, baby feeders, boobs, yazoos, coconuts, funbags, dairy pillows, hubcaps, goombas, sweater puppies, headlamps, hooters, cans, torpedoes, babaloos, honkers, Eisenhowers, badoinkies, rack, cha-chas balloons, knockers, milk jugs, cantaloupes, bazookas, bazoombas, muffins, dirty pillows, boobies, chesticles, bosoms, tatas, tishomingos, whimwhams... *breaths*

Anyway, so I like the fact that Uthy has species dimorphism, I like the fact that this is unsettling to everyone in the Slop world, it SHOULD be disturbing to us, but we're so obsessed with... Those things.. that we take it for granted, we associate it with femininity so it's a crutch that artists use to clarify sex, or just to make a character sexually attractive to a human. You shouldn't find an alligator sexy, well not nominally, I mean I won't judge you if you do.... we're all friends here.... but I digress...

Point is, slap some .. of those.. on a lawn chair, or a vending machine and all of a sudden it has your blood pumping...

Abbott and Costello, Ben and Jerry, Bert and Ernie, Bob and Ray, Bonnie and Clyde, David and Goliath, Fred and Ethel, George and Gracie, Holmes and Watson, John and Paul, Lilo and Stitch, Mickey and Minnie, Mike and Ike, Thelma and Louise, Tweedledee and Tweedledum...


On a related note..

On the subject of confused creatures who try to come off as a feminine yet utterly fail in a repulsive and disturbing way...


















Have we found the inspiration of Uthy?

[Ramseys]

Well we are learning a lot about Uthy, and not all of it bad.
We know that at one time she was a very efficient partner for Sam.
Wicked with a tazer and just her presence made the biggest bad guy shake in their boots... hooves... whatever.
The 'gator is an 'unknown' for many. And going into paw to paw combat is probably a bad idea.
But for some reason Uthy feels her life isn't 'complete'.
Perhaps her 'biological clock' is ticking....
And what better way to attract a mate, then to be famous.
(And have boobies)
Or that Slop scar is itching. And she wants to find Tony.
Notice Sam said, "Bothersome habits".
While he likely included her sexual exploits...
The recent biting incident is a bigger problem.
After all, while with the company, Sam might have set up and ran 'Honeytraps', or at least knew about them and their usefulness in gathering information.
And over the years, Sam has probably has had to resort to using sex, himself.
So her sexual proclivities are not a big issue for him.
Going rogue is.

[George67]

Will Sam fix the problem? If he mentions this to Cooper, Uthy goes away, and Sam is upset with Uthy. My guess is..yes. I'm not sure how he'll do it but its his job to fix problems, grease wheels and pour oil on troubled waters. I think he'll distract her first, and then blindside her with an outside threat to keep her focused on something else. Put her adopted family in danger by some organization that need thinned.

[Buster Charlie]

Going rogue is.

Knowing her propensity for feminine dressing... wouldn't the bigger issue be her going rouge be the bigger threat?

*DUCKS*

[Mulefoot]

"What fake breasts?" huffed the crocodilian damsel. She slid a scaly hand down the front of her polka-dot bathing suit. After a moment of rummaging, she retrieved the so-called fake breast. It bristled with gray fur, though some of it was falling out now. A hint of decay drifted in front of her. "These are real breasts, Sam. Real. You'd be amazed who you have to kill to get tits like these."

[littljohn]

Enter the pig. Exit the alligator. Soon as it can be done unnoticed.

--lj

[George67]

"What fake breasts?" huffed the crocodilian damsel. She slid a scaly hand down the front of her polka-dot bathing suit. After a moment of rummaging, she retrieved the so-called fake breast. It bristled with gray fur, though some of it was falling out now. A hint of decay drifted in front of her. "These are real breasts, Sam. Real. You'd be amazed who you have to kill to get tits like these."

Just when I think Uthy is as about as crazy as she can get, the author tops himself. I felt like backing away from the computer.

[Jadugara]

"What fake breasts?" huffed the crocodilian damsel. She slid a scaly hand down the front of her polka-dot bathing suit. After a moment of rummaging, she retrieved the so-called fake breast. It bristled with gray fur, though some of it was falling out now. A hint of decay drifted in front of her. "These are real breasts, Sam. Real. You'd be amazed who you have to kill to get tits like these."

Just when I think Uthy is as about as crazy as she can get, the author tops himself. I felt like backing away from the computer.

Ha ha!!! Nice.......

And totally grotesque....

...So grotesque, in fact,...that you must pronounce it "GRA-teh-skew"....

I love this new page,...but primarily because, with all her freakish poses, Uthy is really uncomfortably hard to look at...

Jadugara ^_^

[AMountainLion]

Hee... wasn't there a page a long while back where Uthy is asked "Whats with the wig?" and she responds "What wig?"

And after Mulefoot's comment, I have to wonder if that 'wig' from that page was actually some unlucky fur's scalp at one time.

And that in turn makes me wonder what the species equivalent to Native Americans is, in Mulefoot's reality.

[Mulefoot]

Hee... wasn't there a page a long while back where Uthy is asked "Whats with the wig?" and she responds "What wig?"

And after Mulefoot's comment, I have to wonder if that 'wig' from that page was actually some unlucky fur's scalp at one time.

And that in turn makes me wonder what the species equivalent to Native Americans is, in Mulefoot's reality.

She doesn't really have some other critter's breasts tucked in her bathing suit...or does she? That was just a bit of silliness.

As for your question about what species are equivalents to Native American...that would be SLOP races based on species native to North America. I just mentioned a new one on the current page called Klandagh. He's a cougar...a mountain lion. Some others are: Coyono(coyotes) Fel(white-tailed deer), Cunni(jack-rabbits), Weekasah(raccoons), Harhusa(bears), Sekakwa(skunks), Tungka(wolverines) and while I've shown one opossum, I've yet to name them. I'm inclined to call them the O'Pogo. Their former cultures have been mostly obliterated by the dominant european canine culture which dominates the Fedarated Union of States even now.

I should note that in some areas of the world, a species evolved a sentient form and in some areas they did not. There are no sentient African lions in SLOP. Oroslani and Singha both come from Asiatic lions. North America had no sentient canines in SLOP other than Coyono.

I need to get back to work on a SLOP wiki.

[Uncle]

North America had no sentient canines in SLOP other than Coyono.

Which just goes to show the Renards fucked buffalo.

Unca.

[Abraxus]

*Post deleted due to me accidentally quoting my own post*

[Abraxus]

Fake breasts? Well why would Sam think that she has fake breasts. Just because she's a reptile, he-

*Realization* Oooooh.

But then, her mental state...

*Further realization* Oooooooooooh!

...

I wonder how she's keeping them on.

Hmm. Specieal body dysmorphia issues?

Edit: I hope Uthy doesn't take a good look at Coyana girls.

A well endowed Coyana girl needs three bikini tops... and I can barely stomach one set of fake gazongas on a croc let alone three.

[Uncle]

A well endowed Coyana girl needs three bikini tops...

If you knew she was a pig before you married her, why'd you do it?

It was those two rows of tits...

Uncle.

[Abraxus]

A well endowed Coyana girl needs three bikini tops...

If you knew she was a pig before you married her, why'd you do it?

It was those two rows of tits...

Uncle.

I've seen bitches with 5 rows of tits and a litter large enough that all the little runts need to take turns sucking up milk.

It's a marvel the Slopverse hasn't outstripped the resources of its planet hundreds of years ago, with specieal population expansion of that magnitude. 13 sucklings a household, in some cases? Holy shit man.

On the other hand, that might be balanced out by other sentients that reproduce at a much slower rate... I can't figure out the math on that one. I've a simple horse brain in my head, and horse brains aren't very good at mathematical equations.

Jadgura, I want to hear your opinions about this as well. Also you're an amazing artist. You add a lot here every time you submit something visual that you've created. A well crafted image can say more than a 211 page book can, and I've seen you draw the equivalent of a 211 page book a couple times already. I have a lot of respect for people who have a good mind in their brains.

Also: Sorry if some of what I'm saying is strange. I'm not sober right now, and all of this is subject to creative editing when I return to a sober state of mind.

- Curse you, Captain Morgain! D: - Or bless you. One man's mania is another man's insight.

Edit: I'm never drinking again. I'm leaving this up as self-punishment. I deserve to be embarrassed.

Worst hangover ever. And a flu too. Drinking kills your immune system for a while. Very nasty.